De Bait

This week’s debate/Trump bash will take place tonight in Detroit, Michigan. In an effort to be fair and balanced and allow more people access to the debate, Fox has assigned Donald Trump a spot on the corner of Trumbull and Lincoln Streets. (See the twenty-five most dangerous neighborhoods in America (1).)

The other three candidates and the moderators will be at the Fox Theatre at 2211 Woodward Avenue, but good luck with getting tickets. The Republican Party has received 21,000 requests, but only 50 tickets will be available to the public (2).

Mr. Trump’s supporters are urged to join him at the corner of Trumball and Lincoln.

Rather than wait until tomorrow, Growltiger will save her dear readers the agony of watching yet another Republican slugfest, so going by what has gone before, here is her premature report on tonight's debate.

According to Fox's political pundits, Marco Rubio won, just as he has won all the debates except the one in New Hampshire where no amount of time in the spin cycle could dry him off.

John Kasich came in second, Ted Cruz third.

Donald Trump was terrible. He shouldn’t be allowed to participate because:

• He runs with scissors.
• He has small hands. (One of Marco Rubio’s brilliant jokes).
• He isn’t a conservative. 
• He donated money to Democrats in the past.
• He may have done business with the Mafia in New York, something no businessman in New York ever does or has done. 
• He didn't personally check out every person with whom he did business down to his/her third cousin once removed.
• He doesn’t properly vet the people attending his rallies and white supremacists might sneak in.
• He doesn’t have enough African-Americans at his rallies. Diamond and Silk don’t count. (3)
• David Duke did not endorse him but that doesn’t matter because Trump has not disavowed David Duke in every sentence he speaks.
• Thirty-five years ago a sub-contractor on the Trump Tower hired illegal (Polish) immigrants.
• He won’t release his tax returns. Being under IRS audit is no excuse.
• He might not be as rich as he says. 
• He's too rich.
• He will build a wall which will make Mexico mad and cut down on illegal immigration.
• He won’t build a wall; he’s lying about that.
• He’s been married three times.
• He said Planned Parenthood does good things for impoverished women. Being against abortion isn’t good enough.
• He’d be neutral in negotiating a peace deal between Israel and Palestine which means he doesn’t like Jews even though his daughter is one. 

Dr. Ben Carson wasn’t there. Dr. Ben paused his campaign. Not that it matters. In the previous 35 debates, the moderators didn’t ask him any questions anyway. Especially not about health care.

Speaking of the moderators. Fox News couldn’t get the Pope, Hillary Clinton or El Chapo, so they settled for Bret Baier, Megyn Kelly and Chris Wallace.

The Fox fox and her two cohorts worked all week with Fox News’s vice president of News and Washington managing editor, Bill Sammons, to come up with questions to help the political establishment, king-makers, big donors, conservative pundits destroy Donald Trump help voters decide. That Mr. Sammons’s daughter, Brooke Sammons, is Marco Rubio’s press secretary has nothing to do with Fox News’s neutrality. Only the most cynical of readers will wonder whether Senator Rubio had any inkling of the questions that would be asked beforehand.

After all, as Mark Twain says, "If voting made any difference they wouldn't let us do it."

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(1) http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/02/most-dangerous-neighborhoods-america-detroit_n_3187931.html

(2)Tickets

(3) http://www.diamondandsilkinc.com/